He has a girlfriend.
I can't even think right know. It was just updated 2 minutes ago, while I was chatting with him. Perfect.
My friend had a similar thing happen to her. We started to intern for Environment California on the No On Prop 23 Campaign (STOP THE DIRTY ENERGY PROP) Anyway, our boss was way HOTT and super awesome and she totally fell for him. She spent like 5 hours a day with him and was really attached to him. We would always come home from work and talk about all of the signs he was giving her. Then it was ruined, and I was there. We were talking about next weeks plans and he said, "I wont be here this weekend because I'm going up to Portland to visit my girlfriend." It took everything I had to not look at her reaction. When he walked away, she was crushed. She can't even talk to him anymore because of what happened.
Damn it all.
Monday, October 18, 2010
HELP ME!
I need some serious help. I am getting so worked up over this guy and I have never even hung out with him. I feel like I only like the idea of him, rather than the actual person. Its impossible to tell because I don't know what he is like in person. I keep getting so worked up when I am around him that I probably seem so dull. I am trying with all my might to act normally around him, but then I think about how much I want him to like me. I know that if he doesn't like me for who I am, a relationship is worthless, but it just doesn't translate. I want him to love me.
I was browsing his profile on FB like I do everyday (I know you have done that before!) and my heart dropped to a point where I lost sensation in my toes. He had removed his relationship status. His FB no longer said he was "single." Does that mean he got a girlfriend? Or that he likes someone? It doesn't say anything more so I really have no clues. Maybe he just didn't want it to show anymore, or he doesn't want a girlfriend, I have no idea. I have calmed down a bit more now, but it still bothers me immensly.
The "don't talk to Bass Guy plan" failed miserably. I was working in the quad when my friend told me he was walking my way. Not towards me, but by me.
"Talk to him, say hi."
"No. I decided I am not talking to him until he talks to me."
"That's dumb, wave!"
"It's not dumb, no!"
"He's coming wave, say hi, do something."
"No." As I said that Bass Guy, who was looking my way, made eye contact. Oops. I pretended I didn't notice and looked away, and he walked off. Fail.
After that a few days passed, no Bass Guy. He doesn't even sign onto FB. He was busy practicing for the multiple concerts. (Speaking of which, is it smart to go to one?) And finally he is on FB, but inactive. Nothing, he doesn't say a word and signs off. He is probably relieved I am not chatting his eyes out. Oh good, that girl isn't interested anymore.
He signed back on last night and I said, "Hey, haven't talked to you in a while, how has life been going?" And we chat once again. It was shorter than some of the first ones, but it still made me feel good inside. But that feeling is gone today. I am sick of this game.
Should I ask to go to lunch one day? As friends, just to really communicate... I'm scared I'm gonna mess it up by not being true to my personality. HELP.
I was browsing his profile on FB like I do everyday (I know you have done that before!) and my heart dropped to a point where I lost sensation in my toes. He had removed his relationship status. His FB no longer said he was "single." Does that mean he got a girlfriend? Or that he likes someone? It doesn't say anything more so I really have no clues. Maybe he just didn't want it to show anymore, or he doesn't want a girlfriend, I have no idea. I have calmed down a bit more now, but it still bothers me immensly.
The "don't talk to Bass Guy plan" failed miserably. I was working in the quad when my friend told me he was walking my way. Not towards me, but by me.
"Talk to him, say hi."
"No. I decided I am not talking to him until he talks to me."
"That's dumb, wave!"
"It's not dumb, no!"
"He's coming wave, say hi, do something."
"No." As I said that Bass Guy, who was looking my way, made eye contact. Oops. I pretended I didn't notice and looked away, and he walked off. Fail.
After that a few days passed, no Bass Guy. He doesn't even sign onto FB. He was busy practicing for the multiple concerts. (Speaking of which, is it smart to go to one?) And finally he is on FB, but inactive. Nothing, he doesn't say a word and signs off. He is probably relieved I am not chatting his eyes out. Oh good, that girl isn't interested anymore.
He signed back on last night and I said, "Hey, haven't talked to you in a while, how has life been going?" And we chat once again. It was shorter than some of the first ones, but it still made me feel good inside. But that feeling is gone today. I am sick of this game.
Should I ask to go to lunch one day? As friends, just to really communicate... I'm scared I'm gonna mess it up by not being true to my personality. HELP.
Tuesday, October 12, 2010
Love It All
Things have been going almost perfectly the past couple of days. Bass Guy and I chat on FB every night and on monday, he sat next to me! And we talked in person!
I said almost perfectly for a reason though. There are a few doubts that are ever present in my mind. The first is really bothering me.
There's a girl. No, not a girlfriend. But he still talks to her in person more than me and she is WAY skinnier than me. Not that I am fat, because I'm not, she is just very very skinny.
The other is that our conversations on FB are getting shorter. Well more like he is either tired of talking to me, or he really is sleeping more. I am trying to be optimistic and just say that the past couple hour long conversations messed up his sleeping schedule. Sunday night he logged off to go practice for a few hours and he said he would log back on around ten. So I waited. And he never signed back on. I eventually logged off and the next day he sat next to me in class and apologized profusely.
"I am so sorry I didn't sign back on last night, I finished practicing early and picked up a book to read for a little bit and I got lost in the book. I'm sorry," He said as soon as he sat down. I smiled and told him it didn't bother me, because I had an essay to write. Which was true.
That night we went to a study session together, kind of, and then I chatted with him for about an hour later that night. I'm worried it was a bit of an overload because last night when I went to talk to him again we only talked for about an hour before he went to bed.
In conclusion, I am not going to chat with him until he chats with me first. If he doesn't say anything in the next 2 days, then MAYBE I'll say something.
I don't really know what to do now. I am leaving the rest to him.
Oh and I forgot to mention, I made no eye contact nor did I even register that he was there and he still sat next to me. It was all on his own accord.
I said almost perfectly for a reason though. There are a few doubts that are ever present in my mind. The first is really bothering me.
There's a girl. No, not a girlfriend. But he still talks to her in person more than me and she is WAY skinnier than me. Not that I am fat, because I'm not, she is just very very skinny.
The other is that our conversations on FB are getting shorter. Well more like he is either tired of talking to me, or he really is sleeping more. I am trying to be optimistic and just say that the past couple hour long conversations messed up his sleeping schedule. Sunday night he logged off to go practice for a few hours and he said he would log back on around ten. So I waited. And he never signed back on. I eventually logged off and the next day he sat next to me in class and apologized profusely.
"I am so sorry I didn't sign back on last night, I finished practicing early and picked up a book to read for a little bit and I got lost in the book. I'm sorry," He said as soon as he sat down. I smiled and told him it didn't bother me, because I had an essay to write. Which was true.
That night we went to a study session together, kind of, and then I chatted with him for about an hour later that night. I'm worried it was a bit of an overload because last night when I went to talk to him again we only talked for about an hour before he went to bed.
In conclusion, I am not going to chat with him until he chats with me first. If he doesn't say anything in the next 2 days, then MAYBE I'll say something.
I don't really know what to do now. I am leaving the rest to him.
Oh and I forgot to mention, I made no eye contact nor did I even register that he was there and he still sat next to me. It was all on his own accord.
Thursday, October 7, 2010
3rd Time's the Charm
So I guess that is true. I was feeling gutsy again, so I attempted to talk to Bass Guy again. This time he was actually active, so if he didnt talk to me this time i would be screwed.
"Hey," I wait a second.
And then I heard it... Pop.
"Yo." I could feel my face start to burn. I didn't think of anything to say. I ask my suitemates and tell me to relax. While I panic, he types, "What's up?"
I breathe a sigh of relief. With the aid of my suitemates, I type, "Just watching Youtube videos and chilling with my suitemates. How about you?"
"Just studying for my geology midterm and drinking some wine." And the conversation was off. We talked about volcanoes, earthquakes, the sierras, NAS and a bunch of other random stuff. I know not really romantic, but I have to start somewhere.
When we were talking about NAS, I asked, "Are you going to the extra credit thing tomorrow night?"
"I don't know, maybe." He replies. We continued to talk about the extra credit thing and eventually he said, "Well, I have to go to bed, maybe I'll see you tomorrow?"
"Maybe, good night."
"Good night :)" And he signs off. I can't tell if I am over analyzing everything, but a smiley face is a good sign, right? Maybe not that he likes me, but that we are becoming friends? If so, that rocks. And doesn't "Maybe I'll see you tomorrow?" sound hopeful?
There's a lot going through my mind right now, I'll definitely post if he comes to the meeting thing. If he does, I wont be disappointed though, because I know he is probably practicing his with upright bass.
"Hey," I wait a second.
And then I heard it... Pop.
"Yo." I could feel my face start to burn. I didn't think of anything to say. I ask my suitemates and tell me to relax. While I panic, he types, "What's up?"
I breathe a sigh of relief. With the aid of my suitemates, I type, "Just watching Youtube videos and chilling with my suitemates. How about you?"
"Just studying for my geology midterm and drinking some wine." And the conversation was off. We talked about volcanoes, earthquakes, the sierras, NAS and a bunch of other random stuff. I know not really romantic, but I have to start somewhere.
When we were talking about NAS, I asked, "Are you going to the extra credit thing tomorrow night?"
"I don't know, maybe." He replies. We continued to talk about the extra credit thing and eventually he said, "Well, I have to go to bed, maybe I'll see you tomorrow?"
"Maybe, good night."
"Good night :)" And he signs off. I can't tell if I am over analyzing everything, but a smiley face is a good sign, right? Maybe not that he likes me, but that we are becoming friends? If so, that rocks. And doesn't "Maybe I'll see you tomorrow?" sound hopeful?
There's a lot going through my mind right now, I'll definitely post if he comes to the meeting thing. If he does, I wont be disappointed though, because I know he is probably practicing his with upright bass.
Sunday, October 3, 2010
I'm Desparate.
I need a boyfriend this instant. I'm going to loose my mind. For the past two nights I have been having embarrassing dreams.... A particular moment that puzzled me was when I made out with a cute guy that had a crush on another girl. The startling detail was when I woke up and realized I recognized the boy. It was not Bass Guy but a boy who has been volunteering with me.
I have been debating on giving up on Bass Guy. My efforts are futile. So I guess my mind has moved on to the next subject already. I don't know his name, but he is cute, funny, and cares about the environment. That just sounds so fabulous to me. I'm gonna try to talk to him now and let Bass Guy fade into the background for a while. I have not given up on him yet though. Wow, I sound like such a slut. Damn it.
I must find out this guys name!
I have been debating on giving up on Bass Guy. My efforts are futile. So I guess my mind has moved on to the next subject already. I don't know his name, but he is cute, funny, and cares about the environment. That just sounds so fabulous to me. I'm gonna try to talk to him now and let Bass Guy fade into the background for a while. I have not given up on him yet though. Wow, I sound like such a slut. Damn it.
I must find out this guys name!
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